Holy Kii'

In my attempt to talk about something beyond myself, I’m going to talk about everything else.

Bangkok

We went. It was two weeks ago. We ate cheese. It’s a huge city with even huger malls. We mostly stared at the other whhhite people while trying to figure out why there was an eyelash extension studio in a freaking sky train station. We also danced and then smoked Shisa and then I spoke some Arabic. It was all a bit too nostalgic for embarking on this new and exciting, wide-as-the-sky grand adventure. Yet the BKK trip confirmed that I’m not here for pomp and hot dudes in hostels, but for banana trees outnumbering neighbors.

Really, I’m just relieved.  

Peace Corps Pre-Service Training culture

We all have cabin fever and can find nothing to talk about beyond our anticipation for our site announcement tomorrow. And each other, I guess. Again, it’s all a bit much. Let’s start our job already.

Really, I’m just restless.  

Language Competency Exam

Our mouths competed to take up the same space, and our success or tears definined our competency. It’s all a bit irrelevant and dependent on our feelings and self perceptions. We are  going to pass and will get sworn in. If our trainers didn’t think so then we would have had a talking to already. And we haven’t. At this point language will only stop us from making close Thai friends until we can actually talk beyond what we ate for breakfast. But we do know how to say more than we did back in the day when we were “di chan chuuing” (Shout out to my girl Hoi for that golden code-switch moment.) Really we all just want to survive--not just physically, but emotionally. Making Thai friends doesn’t depend on how we can analyze cultural differences between our new and old homes, but being able to laugh and dance and call your mom bababobo (crazy) once in a while.

Really, I’m just learning.

 Site Announcement

THIS IS TOMORROW. WE FIND OUT WHERE OUR HOMES FOR THE NEXT TWO YEARS ARE AAHHHHHINELOQUENTBABBLEABOUTFELINGSANDMIXED

EMOTIONSANDTHENAVAGUEMETAPHORFORSTRESSSAAHHHHHH. Again. Let’s get this rice-filled, altruistic, isolating experience ~literally and metaphorically~ on the road. The fire in my belly has been forging the steel in my spine for this experience long enough.

Really, I’m just excited.

Thai Family

I’m really going to miss my Thai host family. I’m sure my new family at site will provide just as crazy and blog-worthy experiences, but This one was my first. And they’re special. They’ve been generous, inclusive, personable, and I wish I could say all of those adjectives in Thai. Still, they’ve given me the ability to “puut lin” (joke) in a way I may not have been able to otherwise. They eased my nerves, introduced me to friends, and included me in their evenings of playing Facebook. Bless them.

Really, I’m just nervous.